This tip sheet is intended to help you become more aware of your self-talk and how it relates to your self-image or ego. There are three categories below, the superior fragile ego, the inferior fragile ego and the middle way or an ego that is strong and centred. The middle way is what you are aiming for for each of the topics.
Honesty
Superior- I am right. Others have faults, not me.
Middle way- I will listen to your opinion, and give me feedback, because I can learn
Inferior- I am a liar, I am a fraud
Failure
Superior- It is other's fault
Middle way- I admit and learn from my mistakes. I accept that some things are beyond my control.
Inferior- It's all my fault.
Success
Superior- I did it all, I am better than you.
Middle way- I used my talents and it all came back together on the day.
Inferior- It was pure luck. The judges didn't know what they were talking about.
Self-Image
Superior- I spend a lot of time marketing myself. I am vain, appearance matters a lot.
Middle way- I accept my looks and body. I care for myself through diet and exercise.
Inferior- I am not intelligent enough. I am ugly, lazy and there is not point trying.
Willpower
Superior- I control myself by watching everything I do.
Middle way- I can hold on and let go when appropriate. I live with passion and desire.
Inferior- I don't feel in control at all. I am impulsive and can't stop myself.
Needs
Superior- I don't need anything from anyone.
Middle way- My needs are reasonable. I recognise and express my needs.
Inferior- I am so need and it's pathetic. I'm needy and show it.
Personal Boundaries
Superior- I don't let anyone in.
Middle way- I can let you in, or choose to keep a distance.
Inferior- Anyone can get in.
At Charleston Consulting, we offer a variety of services that can help your psychological needs. If you would like to learn more, please check out the Thrive Learning Program course which can help to improve your quality of life.
https://www.petercharleston.com/courses
Feel free to send me an email and tell me what you think. I am happy to have a chat with you about how coaching psychology could help.